Friday, August 29, 2008

That does it. I'm voting for McCain.

Not because he is indirectly promoting Intelligent Design. Not because he wants Church and State to be less separate. Not because he is against abortion or supports off shore oil drilling, All of which I completely support (/endsarcasm). It's because he selected a fly ass middle aged honey for vice president. This was a great strategy. Pull in all of the Hillary supporting femenists, and the horny adolescent boys in one fell swoop. Bravo John McCain... Bravo.

Ok kids. Can you say milf? Cmon, say it with me. Miiiiiilllllffff.

PS - There is some serious E-Drama going on about this over at

Monday, August 25, 2008

August 19th = National Good Rap Day

What is better than a phenomenal rap album being released?
Answer: TWO phenomenal rap albums being released.

GZA's Pro Tools and Ice Cube's Raw Footage both came out on August 19th. I got a copy of both and after listening to them over the weekend, I've concluded that these are probably the best two rap albums of the year to date. Each is successful at delivering the style that is they are both know for. GZA spits lyrical wizardry over Wu-Tang style gritty beats, while Cube has the hard hitting flow that tackles everything from politics to the hood. The only problem I had with Raw Footage is that some of the songs have a Dirty South feel to them. His lyrics are still solid, but they don't belong in songs like that. The first song right after the intro is called "I got my Locs On"... and it features Young Jeezy. Talk about bad first impressions. Luckily after managing to separate the ones with the Southern influence from the ones that fit Cube, I still came out with a lot of great music.

Here are my favorite tracks on each album:

Pro Tools
Alphabets - I absolutely love this beat. It's simple, yet so addictive that it can get you nodding more than a child with Bobble-Head Doll Syndrome.
Groundbreaking - Another nasty beat. Plus the second verse features his son, Justice. They switch off and finish eachother's rhymes, Run-DMC style.
0% Finance - He goes crazy. Non stop rapping throwing out about every Car metaphor you can think of. It's one of those songs that shows why he deserves the name Genius.
Interlude - A interview clip describing how he saw a Wu Tang logo tattooed on someone's face. "I've never seen a G-Unit logo on someone's face or arm" hints at his next song.
Paper Plates - The song name implies that 50 Cent's music is disposable. He tears him up good. I love when good rappers put the bad ones in their place.
Cinema - A pretty creative song alluding to horror movies.

Raw Footage
Intro - Basically Ice Cube has a pyroclastic flow. "Red hot lava, mixed with saliva."
It takes a Nation - The chorus alludes to a Public Enemy song. Like most of his songs, this one has some heavy hitting wicked lyrics. "I got King Kong in the trunk. King Kong in the doors / My nuts play ping from the noise / You can hear me from a block away / I'm sitting next to yo ass and can't hear what you got to say"
Gangsta Rap Made Me Do It - True gangsta beat. He takes a sarcastic approach to society blaming rap for everything negative. "I keep it gangsta, and why should I change that / Fuck you old motherfuckers tryin' to change rap / But ain't you the same cat, that sat back when they brought cocaine back" He throws in some specifics too. "If I call you a nappy headed ho, ain't nothin to it. Gangsta Rap made me do it.(referring to Don Imus)" "If I shoot up ya college, ain't nothin to it. Gangsta rap made me do it.(referring to recent college shootings)"
Hood Mentality - It's songs like these where his lyrics shine. Each verse focuses on a different aspect of the "Hood Mentality". Drug dealing / playing sports. He uses a sarcastic approach again which works well.
Do Ya Thang - One of the album's singles. The difference between Ice Cube's club bangers and most others is that he actually shows skill on them.
Get Money, Spend Money, No Money - Another supreme West Coast beast.
Get Used To It - Nasty beat featuring sick verses from WC, and The Game. I love WC. His voice is so thuggish.

9 / 10 for both of them. There were a few songs on each that were below par, but every album has at least one bad song in it (except for Green Day - Dookie). Plus the good songs more than made up for it.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Spore Creature Creator

Best $10 ever spent! Go buy it now and make such monstrosities as these:

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Kafir Girl

Will you marry me?

No? Ok, thats cool. I'll just get your father to marry you off to me. But wait... You ARE at least 1 year old, right? Anything less would be unlawful of course.

Kafir Girl is the creator of a most righteous blog about the Quran, the book of Islam. She takes on the monumental task of actually reading the book (because who actually reads the books they lead their life by?) and writing brilliant responses almost line by line to everything in it. And by brilliant responses, I mean this healthy dose of awesome at the start of chapter 2:

God pulls out the big guns right at the beginning.

"2. This is a book free from doubt and involution"

He just throws that out there: there is no doubt or complexity in this book. No doubt. No complexity. In my opinion, the validity of this entire book absolutely hangs off of this claim. If there is any doubt or complexity in this book, it’s all a sham. I mean, that’s a serious claim there. It doesn’t take long for things to fall apart. A few verses later comes the abrogation clause:

"106. When We cancel a message (sent to an earlier prophet) or throw it into oblivion, We replace it with one better or one similar. Do you not know that God has power over all things?"

God, who is omniscient and all-powerful, makes a neat little loophole for himself, so he can suddenly change his mind and cancel out previous revelations and replace them with newer, better revelations. …I don’t even know what to say.


Mohammed was one clever summabitch. A merchant life was wasted on that guy, he should have been a lawyer...

As you probably guess she is not a muslim, and assuming her quotes are legit, I don't understand how anyone could be when you really think about how nonsensical the verses and ideas sound.

Anyway, head over there if you want a very well written athiest's view on the Quran. ...or if you just want some entertainment. There are 114 chapters in The Holy Quran and she is only on 8, so you'll have plenty of time to catch up.